In June I was cleared to resume work 2 days a week while I received  DMSO treatments.  September 25th was my last scheduled treatment and I was officially in remission of IC and cleared for full-time work.   Full time work in my field with benefits takes time to find, so you patch together what you can until you get what you want.

I am feeling a bit stupid. But it is still early and I need time to get my groove.  I used to know how to manage blog set up and postings, but either things have gotten a bit more complicated or I have lost some smarts.  We all have aging brains and sometimes the littlest details are the things that slip away, so I will give myself some slack here.  But I tend to overcomplicate things and I have two blogs…well two sites, one for blogging and one for trying to sell my knitting patterns and wooly angels.

I have been missing the connection to Vermont and to the farm community.  Missing the sheep and all the feels, smells and sounds of farming.  So by starting up Black Ram Designs I feel a bit more connected.  Yarn in my hand is a constant.  I am always doing projects, so to go back and write-up the patterns and attempt to sell on-line might be a good deal.

Might be, but the details of getting things up and running seem to be more struggle than stride.

I am rusty with the blog thing.  Rusty with the on-line sales and new to all the new fangled ways of selling product.  I am feeling pinched on time as well, I have booked my week with working 2 jobs and have this fantasy that somehow once I get this up and running, the additional postings should be easy.  I always seem to have time to actually do the actual crafting.    The goal here is to find the balance.

Hospice work is emotionally tiring.  I love it, working with patient’s and their families. Working it 2 days a week sounds great, but I am coming in at the end of the week when there has been a lot of action.  It is like being a substitute teacher, getting the class list and then going out and meeting new people or answering  end of life calls, instead getting into a rhythm of seeing patient’s on a regular basis, getting to know them and then being with them at the end.  Working Hospice 2 days a week does not provide a livable wage.

Three days a week I work over at Orvis at legacy place.  Retail pay of 12.00 per hour, but the discount on clothing is awesome better than the pay. So I am able to build myself back up physically and get used to working 5 days a week and at the same time update my wardrobe.   The other really nice thing about working at Orvis is that…. nobody is transitioning to death… the problems that pop are not life ending.  If there customer is not happy with the selection, or fit or color, well that is a luxury problem.

Black Ram Designs is a spin-off from my farm and my designing back in the day.  Instead of writing patterns and selling exclusively to the yarn companies, I will keep the pattern rights and make them available for download.  Or at least that is the plan.  I need to figure out how to get all the digital buttons working on the digital sites.  Not rocket science, but a bit of a challenge, one which I will do one step at a time.