I have never been a fan of pink. I like deeper tones, but pink seems to be the color for this time in my life. You don’t get to choose how G-D presents or connects to you. Your job is to be aware when the Divine does.

I ended the year taking care of this body that holds my spirit and apparently I was not done healing yet, physically, emotionally, or spiritually. In November I had the surgery, then 5 of 6 infusions in December — 2 infections — so I thought it best to get back to VT Christmas Eve day. Which I did, and rested up to get back to work by 1/5/26.

Not what the Divine intended. Car crash on the Friday before I was to return to work. Sometimes it is a knock, one and done, like the car accident. I didn’t need to get that car back, and that decision turned into getting the same car, but one year newer with a cow bumper on it. And the Divine laughs as Evan from Lamoille Valley Ford had it ready in less than a week.

But I tend to be stubborn, and so even in the ED I got the doctor to write a note saying I could return to work, lite duty, on Monday. So I did, and lasted 2 days in the field, then one day working from home, then aware that my brain was not working well due to the concussion. So out again from the 8th to the 15th. Still not enough time to heal, but I went anyway. This resulted in more infections, and the IC symptoms, which I spent November and December trying to heal, came roaring back.

But during this time, right after Christmas, I was in the middle of an Alpenglow — that rose-pink light normally at the edge of day when the sky borrows the color of the Otherworld, and the world goes briefly luminous. But this was in the middle of the day and I was in the middle of it.

Then last week, Tuesday the 10th, I gave final prayers and anointed with sanctified rose oil a patient who lived an extraordinary life. I felt truly honored and felt the tingles in my arms, legs, and right up the back of my head. About a half hour later I saw pink orbs floating around me.

I moved my glasses to see if it was a weird reflection, then considered whether the pink spots were perhaps the beginning of an ocular migraine — but nothing was fractured, nothing was hurting. Only a feeling of peace so profound, I felt the spirit. In Celtic tradition, rose-colored light near a threshold crossing is not illusion — it is the Otherworld briefly visible to those who held the door. A few hours later I had a conversation with agency management and it was clear to me that a shift was made. I called it out, and resigned on the 11th.

Fast, pray, and wait. I fasted for 2 days and then it was made clear to be checked out by my doctor. I had called while fasting to see if there was an opening. Nope, they are booked up. Is there a waiting list for openings? Nope. Ok, well, I am in Vermont and my specialist is in Boston, out the week of the 16th, but her nurse would be in. So pack up and head down. Easier to get to GBU when it is 10 minutes away vs. 4 hours. Monday at 8:31 am I called. Too early hun, call back around 10:30. Sure, called back and ….winning…. I got an opening on Tuesday and got my first DMSO, with a second scheduled for next Monday. Dr. J will be back next Monday and she will give me the map of next steps on this journey.

Tuesday night dreams — one stood out. A single pink rose in bloom. Sub rosa — under the rose — the ancient promise in both Celtic wisdom and Christian mysticism that what is sacred will be held in confidence until the time is right. A single rose in bloom in a dream is a visitation, the thin place opening. I have been writing a great deal, mostly about my maternal line — my mother, my grandmother, my great-grandmother.

Last night I drew a bath and put some arnica oil in, but too much, and my feet and hands turned bright pink… sunburn pink, scalding water pink, sacred baptism by my ancestors pink. I quickly changed to a shower and rinsed it off with minimal damage. Won’t do that again. God laughs.

Medice, cura te ipsum — heal thyself. For the next few months. Take care of this body and this spirit. Write, pray, be open for the next part of this wonderful journey called life.